It's been months since I last attempted to blog on my health situation, blame it on depression. While putting my words down in written form does help in someways it can be mentally draining. Recounting a life unfulfilled at my age cuts deep. Don't take anything for granted! A bike ride, coffee with a friend or even just cooking dinner should be viewed as a blessing. So many dream of simple tasks, don't ignore yours.
In past blogs I've spoken of my love/hate relationship with medications. When your head is spinning with pain the thought of a shot, pill or bowl of pot is like a glass of water to a desert travelor who's parched. On the flip side I've been in bed for a week now with complications from them. It started last Sunday when my intestines said " no more ! " I spent 8 hours in the hospital passing blood at large amounts ( sorry If I get to graffic )I lost about 5-7 cups in total that day and was sent home to complete bed rest and a clear fluid diet. I'm still not able to tolerate anything in my tummy but I'm on the mend. It's a complicated relationship me and medication because it's the NEW medication that got me through the past week. Frustration and questions, good or evil, pros and cons all in all I hate them still !
So in an attempt, once again, I'm going off all med's. Depression will be dealt with walks, if I gain lb's because my thyroid has grown lazy so be it. If my hormones don't like being 52 and my skin sags faster I don't care. My hope is to only use " man made chemicals " in my body for only pain/migraine help and only as needed, not a daily routine. Coffee gone, booze already gone, no soda, no crap ! Not that I think those items are a big cause for my pain but it just can't hurt to go back to nature. Back to cave day style living,as natural as possible in a time when commercialism is at it's highest and beauty is flooding our brains at very turn.
We can't stop as a culture to question ones looks, there will probably be comments behind my back about such nonsense. When my time comes to leave this level of life at least people can say " she tried it all, give or take, success or failure to try to have a fulfilled life against such painful odds."
Have a good Monday healthy people...smile because you have another day to do what you want and are able to do !
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